Yes, Pornography IS an Addiction!! Random Resource ThuRsday

Yes, Pornography IS an Addiction!!

Do I have your attention now?  I mean it's easier to see something visually right like the picture above?

Yes, viewing pornography is an addiction.  And in this country (and around the world even) many don't view it as an addiction.  It's not harming anyone right?  So it can't be bad like drugs or alcohol, right?

Oh so very wrong.  Those who view porn do it to get the same release that say a cocaine user or alcohol user does.  Look at the picture above.  See how the brain responds with the dopamine in almost identical ways?  Look again!  Viewing porn actually releases more dopamine than some other addictions like cocaine, food, morphine.

And the thing is, our minds are wired to store visuals. So, unlike these other addictions which require an item to be inhaled, ingested, drunk, etc in order to product that high - a person addicted to porn can do it without needing an item.  Once a visual is stored in memory, one can retrieve it.  And with the visual is also stored what happened when the visual was first viewed.  And voila. How the cycle continues.

Pornography addictions is so vastly growing.  With the internet, we can pipe these images right onto our computers or ipads, or phones with only a small search.  It's so accessible and can be done right in the privacy of your own home.

But beware, like with other addictions, your need to have that high will increase. And often the urge to view porn and masturbate will come more often esp with triggers and users will often risk more to get that high.  Many a people have LOST THEIR JOBS from viewing porn at work.  Many a marriages have been destroyed because a man would rather masturbate than make love to his wife.

The human being was created to crave intimacy.  When those needs are not met, many turn to pornography.

We thrive on intimate interactions and relationships with others. When our need for intimacy is neglected, our lives seem unpredictable, hostile, and stressful. The desire to escape or take flight from this stress can be overwhelming. When these conditions are present, we’re more likely to seek sources of release through addictive, and often, abusive behaviors. Unfortunately, when the “vacation” from the stressful environment is over, we return to the same, if not worsened, conditions–the negative emotional environment in which we repeat our cycles of addiction.

“With sexual addiction, instant sexual gratification becomes the addict’s most important, all-consuming pursuit. Part of the elevated mood generated by the activity may involve risk. Special routines and patterns may be followed that increase excitement, usually concluding in a sexual event…over which the addict feels absolutely no control.” (P. 295 Darryl S. S. Inaba, Michael E. Holstein, William E. Cohen, Uppers, Downers, All Arounders, CNS Publications, Inc., July 2000, Edition Number: 4.)

Pornography is an illusionary solution to meet the intimate needs of any participant. It shortcuts the natural process of being physically, emotionally, and spiritually close to another. The sensations are superficial. The bitter irony is that pornography and the use of the Internet for sexual expression actually increases the likelihood of separation from others: the exact opposite of intimacy.

I think this visual is very telling.  Look at the search engine request figure.  Look at the misconceptions...it's OK because I'm over the age of 18 and it's not illegal right? I could actually give you lots more figures but I think you get the picture.  I got the visuals from http://pornographyaddiction.com.  It's loaded with information so please check it out and become educated.

Treatment for pornography addictions can be a tricky one.  But with attention growing about this, centers are really starting to take a much more aggressive approach with pornography addictions.  Just as a side note, recoveryBox was first created for pornography addictions and was later expanded to incorporate lots of other addictions.  In some areas, porn treatment centers are co-mingled with places where sex offenders are required to undergo treatment.  Be careful of where you select treatment. As with all programs, if it's not a good fit for you then find somewhere else.  But seek help!

And now I bring this full circle.  Why was this the Random Resource ThuRsday?  Because even possessing an item in the house can lead to a relapse and it's so easy.  So go clean out the attic!  The closet!  Wherever you have it stashed.  If you are not at the stage where you can clean it out because you feel too tempted then ask someone you trust to do it for you.

Check out next week's Random Resource ThuRsday where I offer ideas and resources to protect your eyes, hearts, self, family and children from pornography.

Want recoveryBox, the iPhone app for Addiction Recovery.  There are multiple sex addictions to select from.  See which one meets your needs and download it now.  Be accountable to someone!

What are "Lights?" in recoveryBox?

So you are wondering what exactly are these lights?  That's the easy part...they are your daily activities broken into your greens (the activities/habits you want to build), the yellows (umm, these are people, places or things that are putting you at risk for acting out and you want to avoid them), and the reds (activities that are part of your addiction).

The goal of course is to have as many greens as possible.  By taking care of your green events on a daily basis you will see how you are starting to take care of yourself and your yellows and reds will start to lessen.

Next post, I'll explain how to use those greens to track activities.  recoveryBox is extremely flexible with your lights.  It allows you to basically give weight to the green lights for accountability to your sponsor or accountability partner.  But wait, I'm getting ahead of myself...you'll have to wait until I
get to that blog post.

Can't wait, check out recoveryBox the site for more info.

Want to download from the Apple App store..thanks.  I'm available for questions anytime.

Becoming Accountable with a Sponsor/Accountability Partner using recoveryBox

How To Video Series for recoveryBox iOS App for Addiction Recovery

Below you will find our How To Videos for recoveryBox -becoming accountable. When we want to change a bad habit/addiction often the best thing (and often hardest) is allow ourselves to accountable to another person - most often a mentor or counselor or someone who has been through a similar journey. While choosing that person is difficult, you will know you have chosen well if they make you feel a bit uncomfortable with your negative habits while praising you when you choose well.  By uncomfortable we mean they are holding you accountable by wanting to perhaps talk through what happened or bring to light something that might be holding you back.  

Being accountable with recoveryBox is very easy as not only does the app have all your data that is easily aggregated into a simple email or text, the app allows you to customize how much or little data is being sent based on how you and your accountability partner work together.  recoveryBox even allows you to set up alarms to remind you to send that communication.

You might ask if that app can send the accountability piece automatically to your sponsor or counselor?  The answer is NO!  We believe that you must OWN your recovery and therefore while we have all the tools at your fingertips, you must be the one to make the decision to be accountable to someone else.

Becoming Accountable

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Download recoveryBox Addiction Recovery App - Your Complete Accountability Sobriety Toolbox

Yellow Light Y2 - Intentionally putting oneself at Place of Risk ~ Caution

Some might ask how can being "somewhere" be a Yellow Light?  I mean, it's just a "place" right?

Well, for some with an addiction, just being somewhere can be the trigger.  Even though a "place" doesn't speak to you to convince you to "act out", it can actually trigger the voice in your mind that tells you what to do.

Follow me on this.  For those who suffer from alcoholism, going to a bar for happy hour may not be the smartest of decisions or going to a friends party where you know there will be alcohol.  Because at this "place" you have access to the actual thing that you are trying to break away from.  Or for those suffering from a pornography addiction, perhaps going to Hooters will trigger the feeling inside that you so crave leading to "acting out".  What about those with a shopping addiction?  Should going to the mall be on your agenda?

Now these are not hard and in stone rules.  Of course not.  Each person must decide for themselves if being at a certain place is dangerous to the undoing of their sobriety.  However, sometimes we just don't know.  Or perhaps it is so early in the recovery process that we know these "places" are triggers.

So, I would think logic would say to STAY AWAY!  You have worked so hard to finally admit your problem and start the hard work of beating this addiction, why would you place yourself in harms way?

The reason it is considered a Y2 light, "Intentionally putting oneself at a Place of Risk" is so that you are accountable for putting yourself there.  Remember, Yellow Lights are not acting out lights..these are just the flags that say..Stop and Slow Down! Consider the Implications!  What could this lead to?

Because entering a yellow light requires adding an explanation of the situation it is helpful so that your accountability partner can see the situation.  It is also helpful to begin to see patterns.  When searching over a months time, see how many yellow lights you had.  Are they all on a certain day of the week?  Do they always occur when ...

Sometimes it really is obvious - at least most often for an outsider.  But not always.  And with data at your fingertips, you can't deny the actions of your life.

So PLEASE don't be afraid to report a yellow.  Be accountable to someone for it and perhaps come up with plans on how to change why the yellow even happened so it doesn't turn into a red light in the future.


Don't have recoveryBox yet?  Make the SMALL investment and begin to see your habits change.
To download, click here.  For more information, visit the recoveryBox app website (you can always download it from there if you decide).

Addiction Recovery Motivator Compliance ~ Do I Really Have to??

Being compliant in addiction recovery is NOT an easy task nor is it one that you can just do one day but not the next.  You MUST work at addiction recovery each and every day!!!  Bottom line!!!

As I've said before I'm not a counselor but rather someone who has been through the process of what addiction recovery looks like.  And being accountable each and EVERY day to a sponsor or accountability partner is a must. And it's the same for a traditional 12 Step Program or for Celebrate Recovery.

recoveryBox , the mobile iPhone app built for addiction recovery, has some built in tools that can help you with that if you need some reminding.  And let's face it...in our lives we are so busy that things slip our mind - easily.  And for that, we have what are called MOTIVATORS!

If you click on More Tools in the tab bar on the bottom, you will see a whole list of tools.  Select "Settings" and voila..all sorts of things you can customize!!  I invite you to investigate how these can simplify data entry (again for compliance).

What is a motivator?? It's a reminder that will pop up when you tell it too!  Set one for entering your "lights" for the day or set one to remind yourself to text/email an accountability partner.

You can change the motivator at any point.  You can even turn it off if you don't need one anymore.   Work it out with your 12 step sponsor or accountability partner.  Decide together if you are to text your numbers daily or weekly.  Again, it's all about creating a system that you will be compliant with and that will help during your recovery.

~ Have you set your motivators today??

PS.  Just a small side note, if you set a motivator to text/email on a daily basis then the Accountability Module dates will be set for daily use, but if you select weekly in the motivators tab, then those dates will reflect a one week difference.  Just a small nice thing to help you be consistent.

Haven't downloaded recovery box yet?? 

Get it today and begin your addiction recovery today!!  

Thanksgiving Survival Guide For those in Recovery for an Addiction

This week's Random Resource ThuRsday is about Getting Ready for Next ThurSday ~ Thanksgiving!

Found this wonderful Survival Guide for Thanksgiving (from Crying Out Loud's Blog) and things that we can all do to prepare for what could be a challenging time.  Let's not let a day of which we should reflect and be grateful for those we have in our lives be turned into a day or relapse.  Read on!!

Tuesday, November 23, 2010

Thanksgiving Survival Guide

Thanksgiving is two days away.   Holidays can be difficult for sober people, or people struggling to get or stay sober.

Now is a good time to prepare.

We thought we'd share some tips.   You can not only survive Thanksgiving, you can enjoy it.   All you need to do is plan ahead.    Please add your own in the comments below; this is by no means a comprehensive list.

1. Think ahead.  Is it hard for you to be around alcohol?   Be honest with yourself.  Now is not a time for heroics.   Keep your expectations realistic:  if it is going to be too difficult, maybe this year is a time to do something different for Thanksgiving.   Don't set yourself up to fail.    You can spend a quiet time at home watching movies or hanging out with other friends, volunteer at a shelter serving food, or go to a meeting instead.  
2. Thanksgiving is usually about family.  If there are people in your family who trigger you, be ready.    You don't have to go to every fight you're invited to .. plan what you'll say or do if someone gives you a hard time.  
3. Have safe people to call - program their numbers into your phone in advance, and tell them you're going to call if things get tough.   If everyone around you is drinking and it starts to bring you down, talking to someone else who is sober helps you remember that you are NOT alone.
4. Bring your own beverages.  This is especially important if you're going to be around people who don't know you're sober.   If you always have a drink in your hand, people won't hand you alcohol or ask if you want something to drink.  
5. You don't have to over explain.   If someone is pressuring you to drink, be ready with an answer.   A white lie is totally acceptable - tell people you're on antibiotics, or you're watching your calories and so you aren't drinking.   
6. Have an escape plan.  If you can, bring your own car.    Plan to go for a post-turkey walk - fresh air and exercise will get your endorphins flowing and help tamp down cravings.
7. Plan your exit in advance.   If everyone is going to settle in to watch football and drink and you don't want to be part of it ... don't.   Tell whoever is hosting that you have to leave at a certain time so you don't get drawn in to staying longer than you want to.
8. Remember to be proud of yourself - shame and guilt are huge triggers.   Give yourself credit for staying strong.
9. Think about the next morning, when you'll wake up hangover-free and rested.    Think about how horribly you felt the morning after drinking, and how sober you don't wake up and think, "I wish I drank last night."
10. Think through the drink.   If you start romancing how nice "one drink" would be, remember how many times you told yourself you were only going to have one and failed.    Having one is harder than having none, because once alcohol is in your system the obsession comes alive.
11. Remind yourself that Thanksgiving is just one day.    A simple 24 hours, just like any other day.   Don't put more importance on this day over any other.  
12. Go to bed.   If the day is harder than you expected, go to bed early just to put the day to rest.   Tomorrow is a new day.
13. Believe in yourself.   Getting sober and staying sober takes serious guts - you are brave and strong and true.   If guilt, shame and remorse start talking to you, remind yourself that it's your disease sneaking in the back door.   Let your sober voice ring loud and proud in your head.
14. Forgive yourself for wanting to drink.   Don't expect that you won't be hit with a craving; it's natural.   Prepare for how you're going to handle the craving instead of berating yourself for having one.
15. Be grateful.    Thanksgiving is a time of giving thanks.. make a gratitude list and carry it with you.   Try to focus on the gifts you have in your life, all the possibilities that lie in front of you, instead of all the things you can't have.   Sober, you can do anything. 

Please add more thoughts and ideas in the comments; we want to hear from you.    Addiction thrives in the dark, and together we bring the light.

You are not alone.

And don't forget, add your Lights into recoveryBox, and let your sponsor see how awesome you did!!

Alcohol Recovery App ~ Helping Break the Addiction

recoveryBox - the Addiction Recovery iOS App

recoveryBox was created originally for those in recovery from a pornography or sex addiction.  However, after working with lots of counselors on this concept, we configured recoveryBox so that it would help those who want to break free from the addiction of alcohol.

The preconfigured addiction selection for alcohol has suggestions of the types of habits that need to be broken (called your red lights).  But you can create your own type of addiction that would work better for you by creating your own custom red lights.

By tracking your good habits (green lights) as well as warning situations (yellow lights - people, places, and things) and triggers you can create a clear picture of what habits you have as well as need to break.

Keep accountable with your sponsor or counselor or accountability partner. recoveryBox will let you know it's time to enter your daily lights as well will remind you to connect with your sponsor.

recoveryBox works well with a traditional 12 Step Program or Celebrate Recovery.  Try recoveryBox today. Available for any Apple iDevice.

Don't worry if the lights you see here don't match what you need help with. Customize the addiction to match what you need to track. Users will also want to track their triggers (also customizable) so that accountability partners/sponsors can get a good picture of what's going on.

Want to break the addiction? Accountability does work!

Part 3 : One to One Accountability and Your Sponsor

This is where the the entire concept for recoveryBox comes together. You have been diligent about entering your Lights and Triggers and now...

It's time to be honest with someone other than yourself.  And that's why you have a sponsor or accountability partner from a traditional 12 Step Program or from Celebrate Recovery.

When you send a text/email to your accountability partner, it will tally all of the Green, Yellow and Red lights.  You select the time frame (when I write more about the accountability module I'll explain how the dates default).

This is what's so awesome..there is no remembering what the day or week looked like because you already did the work when you entered the lights!!  And believe me it is work being honest to yourself.  

As you can see I use recoveryBox to text (as that's the default I set up) each day by 10:00PM.   It really is that simple and my sponsor can see  as a snapshot what my day looked like.  Let's see an example of what the system builds as a started text/email ( I can edit the piece of communication if I want before I send it too).

As you can see it puts the date (and in my case it's just the one date otherwise it's the range of dates I selected). Then it puts a total of my lights broken down by color...My sponsor and I have made a Green target number I'm supposed to hit and it changes as I meet my goals.

The Yellows and Red's are the hardest for me but it's where I'm being completely honest with myself and another.  Under the settings panel I've enabled comments to be added to my communication piece.  I have nothing to hide from my sponsor but it's nice to have the option (again, when I write more about that module, I'll show you how to enable those).

If I entered any triggers for the day, anything over a green level is included as well as my journaling.  I love being able to communicate to my sponsor without having to retype anything..yet I have it all recorded for me.  Sometimes my sponsor sees something that he is concerned about and will either call or text me back right away..but most times I just get a response saying "OK".  And that's all I need.

This part of recoveryBox is what really allows communication and knowledge to happen between my sponsor and myself.  BUT I do use this with my counselor too.  Sometimes I'm asked how the week was and it's so easy to pull up the information any way I want.  And I'm much more accurate because I can't say "I forgot".

Being successful in Addiction Recovery is about making changes.  With recoveryBox you can actually quantify the changes ~ and that's a good thing!

Use recoveryBox now for your Addiction Recovery.

Part 2 : One to One Accountability and Triggers

Adding our Lights is great for seeing what we did on a certain day but it's not enough if we are going to figure out the why we do what we do.  I could easily have 26 Green Lights for the day but is it because I was making good choices on a certain day or was it in response to a trigger..say boredom.

Triggers really work well when adding yellow and red lights but we can also gain a lot of information about our addiction if we record our triggers on a daily basis.

recoveryBox tracks triggers much like the light system for daily activities.  At the beginning of the day we start at a 0 Intensity level which is Green.  Then as the day goes on something happens and we start to get frustrated, or bored or depressed and we have different levels which will go into Warning for Yellow and I NEED HELP RED.

Again, visually helping us see as we swipe through our days will make habits/triggers/etc jump out at us!

One day I might feel depressed at a 2 level which is very manageable but the next day that same trigger is at a 8 because I was glossed over by my boss for a promotion.  I may not have acted out and therefore I don't have a Red Light to record BUT I still had those feelings.  And this is where you would record why you had that trigger and didn't act out.  

Many times we will be moving our sliders on days we have acted out but eventually we will learn to not act out and our addiction recovery journey will really take on an entirely new look.

You can journal about the day..and I find it very helpful.  The next segment will show you how to link the accountability for lights and triggers and honestly how it paints a much clearer picture for your accountability partner.  With that information, they can help you with encouragement targeted for what you need.

The Book Icon in the upper right is where you would add your journaling.  If the book icon is empty then you didn't journal but if it's colored orange then you added some meaningful information about your day.

I'll be writing more about this Trigger's Module but for now try adding your triggers daily and see if journaling helps you and your sponsor work together better.  At the very least see if it helps you just feel better getting down your thoughts.  

And yes, I add a Green Light each time I journal or add a trigger.  It means I'm taking care of myself!!

recoveryBox mobile iPhone app for Addiction recovery

Part 1: One-to-One Accountability and Green Lights

This blog post is going to be broken up into 3 different ones.

1.  Adding my Green Lights for Accountability.
2.  Adding Triggers for Accountability
3.  MOST IMPORTANT:: Being Accountable To My Sponsor or Accountability Partner

recoveryBox was built for those who are in recovery for some sort of addiction with some sort of accountability feature.  

When we go through some sort of treatment it's so important that we are honest with ourselves but also someone else..most likely someone who has been there done that.  Usually we choose someone (but not always) who has been there so they understand the pressures we feel and can offer encouragement during those times.

By adding your Lights and Texting/Emailing to a sponsor or accountability partner you are taking ownership of your addiction and telling yourself that you are on the journey to recovery.  It's crucial that we do this!!

Adding G2 One-to-One Accountability Lights are Easy!!

When you Text/Email your Lights to a Sponsor each day that is checking in. That is letting the see a quick snapshot of your day without you have to rehash or even rethink the day. So that's a G2 One-to-One Accountability Green Light I get to add!

I tend to check in with him in the AM with a text to say Good Morning but at night after my day is done I send a text of my Lights.  It's a system we created with the use of recoveryBox during a one on one meeting.  

I'm supposed to send my lights by 10:00 PM.  

It's that easy.  Check in and get credit and Being Accountable all in one easy step.

In the next segments, I'll show how adding triggers completes the picture for accountability and what to do with these lights..in other words using the accountability feature.

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Download recoveryBox Addiction Recovery App - Your Complete Accountability Sobriety Toolbox

3 R's ~ Staying Motivated or Risk A Relapse

Random Resource ThuRsday!! 

3 R's ~ Staying Motivated or Risk A Relapse

I know from experience how easy it is to start down the road to recovery feeling the high of finally being free from a horrible secret and thinking I've got this licked!!  And then wham!!!  Something in life hits us and we run back to old habits, acting out and then going into relapse. 

And from there it is such a downward spiral.  Does anyone else know what I'm talking about here?!?

But that's why programs like a 12 Step Program or Celebrate Recovery have accountability partners as part of the approach.  Most of us just can't do this alone!  And we need someone to help us, encourage us, support us and motivate us.

This week I blogged about the Motivator piece of the recoveryBox iPhone Addiction Recovery App.  There is a good reason that is part of the app..it's to help us stay motivated.  Part of us as a person wants to please people other people.  It's part of being connected in life.  So when using a tool such as recoveryBox, it's important to stay motivated for compliance...because that IS one of the biggest pieces to addiction recovery.  You can't "cheat" here and there.  True recovery is to not return to those habits.

While doing research for recoveryBox, I ran across this article about motivation and it helped me focus on how can recoveryBox app can be part of that motivation.  Thanks Peggy for authoring such a great piece and for really just putting it out there in honest terms. 

(look for another blog post in a few weeks about another feature to recoveryBox that is all about motivation.  It's my favorite piece too!)


Addiction Recovery

Maintain Your Recovery Motivation Or You Will Relapse By Peggy L. Ferguson, Ph.D.

People often find their way to recovery in the midst of a crisis. Someone standing at the crossroads of recovery, may have been arrested for DUI, may have been fired, or may have received a scary report from the doctor. He may have heard the bottom line demand from his spouse-- "Get help or we are getting a divorce." Or, the alcoholic/addict may in fact, have a moment of clarity and really be able to see that he does have a problem and that help and abstinence are called for. The alcoholic/addict feels afraid. He feels ashamed. He feels angry at others or at himself for being in this position in the first place.

Fear, coercion or crisis helps him find his way into recovery. Fear is a fairly good short term motivator, but not so good in the long run. Once the fear subsides and the crisis is over, it is very easy to lose your motivation and momentum. At the point where the cycle of addiction is interrupted by failing to take the next drink, dose, or joint, there is a lot of tension, anxiety, and mindfulness of where you are in the process. Detox or withdrawal may occur, with physical and/or emotional symptoms being very consciously experienced.

When you get to feeling better physically and emotionally after detoxing, it is easy to lose your momentum. Your focus on recovery can dissolve. Some of the problems that once motivated your recovery might be resolved now. Because you have quit drinking or using, your spouse and kids are once again speaking to you and are in the process of forgiving you. You may have even won back some trust. Everything seems to be going well.

Under these circumstances it is quite easy for you to take your eyes off the target and lose your focus on recovery. Erroneously, you may believe that your abstinence is not so fragile now. Feeling better, you may think you have it "whipped".

Without actively focusing on your continuing abstinence and recovery, your behavior can begin to drift away from the newly instituted behavioral changes that you have made. You run the risk of returning to old thinking, old feelings, and then ultimately old behavior. The reason why this would happen is that you are not consciously taking steps to continue on a path of recovery. This path involves many changes in your behavior and in your life style. Without making conscious choices in regard to how each decision affects your new recovery life or your old addiction life, you are unconsciously choosing your old life. Choosing recovery is not like jump starting your damaged car battery where once you get it started, it recharges itself as run it. You have to continuously work a program of recovery. Without doing so, your efforts will be short- lived.

You will quit going to counseling. You will quit going to meetings. You will have stopped calling your recovery support people. Your defenses will go back up and you may take exception to the feedback of significant others who tell you that you are acting like you used to before recovery.

You won't be able to see that you are on the road to relapse. You won't be able to understand why they are concerned. You won't be able to identify the behavioral changes that scare them because you will be back in denial. Being around old drinking/using environments and friends don't scare you. You can't understand why it would scare your significant others. After all, you told them that you are not going to relapse. You have learned your lesson. What more do they want?

After awhile, you will begin to think that you have your drinking or using under control now. When you think of addiction as a thing of the past, that you now have it under control, you will begin to entertain the notion that you can now drink or use without negative consequences. If any of this sounds like your recent experience, you are in big trouble. You are in the relapse process and unless you do something now, you will relapse--and soon.

Copyright 2009, Peggy L. Ferguson, Ph.D., http://www.peggyferguson.com Hubbard House Publishing, Stillwater, OK. 

Download recoveryBox, Addiction Recovery App - Your Complete Sobriety Toolbox

Random Resource ThuRsday - So I shouldn't Go "There". Now What?

This week I wrote about how just being at a location is dangerous to the undoing of our sobriety. I found a wonderful resource that talks about this and a lot more.  In this document are tons on strategies to fight the addiction.  Take a look.

For more from this recovery website, visit http://www.markhoustonrecovery.com.

Below is the section from the resource that deals with Being at the Place (the Y2) and strategies.
I am glad the author put this trigger at the top of the list.  It's why I have the Person of Risk as the Y1 and the Place as the Y2 Yellow Lights.  Warning!!  Warning!!  Use Caution here!

Relapse Trigger #1: Putting Yourself In Difficult Situations Like Visiting Your Favorite Bar Or Hanging Out With Friends Who Are Still Using

Perhaps the most difficult part of recovery is leaving behind old friends or old habits that got us into trouble in the first place. Even if we are committed to staying away from your previous group of friends or hangouts, if we don’t change our habits and interests, we can quickly find yourself with a new group of friends or hangout spots that are just as damaging to our recovery process.
Relapse Prevention Action Plan:

• Find alternative places to hang out like a local bookstore or coffee shop.
  
• Choose companions who seek a healthy lifestyle.
  
• Go to a recovery based meeting. 
  

I really do encourage you to read the rest of the pdf file.  It is loaded with strategies to help in your addiction recovery.

To download recoveryBox,visit the Apple App Store.

Complete Customization for Yellow Lights

There have been many requests to be able to personalize an addiction to make it so that Red Lights are meaningful to the events in your life. And that was a huge success.

COMING SOON
And so we heard your requests and have now added customized Yellow lights.

Yellow lights can be added while customizing red lights for the addiction you create OR you can choose to not create custom yellow lights and use the People, Place, Things pre-defined lights that are available for every pre-defined addiction OR you can use both.

We at recoveryBox want to create the most flexible app so that you will want to use it to be accountable. Recovery is all about accountability and adhering to your plan.

We are planning for this release to be available before the holidays and are in testing stages now. As soon as it's available we will post asap.

Yes, we do listen to your requests and try to implement them. So if you have more ideas, please let us know.  And may your recovery journey be one filled with success.

~ Be supported!

To download recoveryBox, visit the Apple Store.

Building My Personal Lights Comment (activities) List

Adding your lights and customizing activities for yourself is very easy.  And once you have added your Green Light Category activities, entry will be a snap which WILL raise your compliance during your addiction recovery treatment.

First, comments for Green Lights (which are the activities that you do daily) are really only there for your own accountability and record keeping.  In other words, your accountability partner is going to know how many green lights you are aiming to get a day but doesn't really need to know all of the details.  From day to day these are going to change as you start to take care of yourself more and more.  So to have them know that you took a shower may not be the most important detail but for you it just might be.

(However, yellow and red lights require comments and can't be selected from a list..so this will only apply to your Green Lights.  And your accountability does need to know the why for a yellow or red light.)

To add a comment (an activity) for a Green Light, just click on the Comment(s) field where the Stop Light is.  From there you will be brought to a screen where you can either type in your comment OR you can click the Select From Comments Button. 

Don't worry, just because you want to select from a list for quick data entry doesn't mean that you can't edit it afterwards.  You'll see.

The comment list that you build is based on which Green Light you selected on the initial screen.  In this case, we are working with the G1 Physical Self Care.  You will only see the associated comments (again think activities) which makes it easier so that you are not searching through a long list. 

Now, you may select just one activity if you are the type of user who is entering Green Lights one by one during the day as they occur.  OR, if you are the type of person who wants to do all entry of lights at once then you can select more than one from the list. 

Don't see what you are looking for??  Want to add another more personal activity?  

No problem. Just select Create Personal Comment for Category. 

OK, add what you would like.  Let's say you want to track that you shower each day.  OK.  Add that.  You only have to add it once and it's in your list forever (or until you decide to delete it!  to delete from the list just swipe like all other Apple apps).

OK, select the new activity that you just created and hit done.

Well, since comments are like a personal journal, it would be a shame to have written thoughts and then get them overwritten. The system will prompt your to either Replace your existing comments with the newly selected activities or to Append it to the end of what you already wrote.  

For kicks and giggles select Replace.

OK, you have the ability to change what the comments look like here.  Remember selecting from the list is just for quick data entry but it needs to be personal to you so feel free to edit if you so desire. Now hit save.

And there they are ready to go.  Since I wanted to add all 3 of my G1's at one time I select 3 from the spinner so I get credit for 3 Green G1 lights.  If you want to edit your comments before you Generate Lights , just click the Comment(s) field again and it will allow you to edit them as you please.

Not everyone is going to want to document green lights to such a degree but it's there if you want to.

The idea behind this is to have a number of Green Lights that you are shooting for each day and let your accountability partner know that number.  When you text/email your Lights they will be able to see how many you had for the day.  Change your goal higher and higher as you progress in your treatment and you will start to see how your life style begins to reflect that of someone taking care of yourself.  Your habits will change.

Don't have recoveryBox yet and want to the latest mobile app for addiction recovery, then visit the iPhone Apple app store.

For more information about recoveryBox and all the features, then visit recoveryBox's website.Personal Lights Comments (activities) List.

Random Resource ThuRsday - Inhalants

Many times when we talk about addictions we immediately think about drugs and alcohol. Thinking about inhaling something is not the first thing that comes to mind but it is one of the most easily accessible of "things" to become addicted to.

Think about it, what's under your kitchen sink? Or in your garage? Sniffing inhalants is an addiction that starts when kids are young. Yes, kids DO go in the garage and sniff a can of paint. And just one time can cause irreversible brain damage or even death. It's a horrible addiction.  Keep reading to become educated on inhalants. Parents when you talk to your kids about drugs and alcohol, don't forget this IS a drug even if it's legal to get.

To find out more visit Drug Free World's Post on Inhalants or visit their entire site.  It's filled with loads of information. 

Below is the post from Drug Free World.  Become Educated!

When You Feel the Crave, What Routine Do You Do?

One of the most important parts of being able to deal with an addiction is knowing what our triggers are.  Once we figure those out, we can start to reprogram ourselves with "new habits" that we insert into the place of the "old habits" when we sense those triggers or cravings.

For instance, a young girl bites her nails down to nibs and to the point that she can't use her fingers anymore because of the pain. Upon, tracking her data she realizes that she was bored and therefore started biting (and didn't even know it). But as she started to pay attention to the fact that she was bored, she began to figure out her cue and then inserted a new behavior...get up and go get a glass of water.

Another example, a young successful business man ends up drinking and has created such a bad habit of it that his wife has left him. He doesn't understand why because he provides for her every need.  Upon figuring out his triggers, he realized that his anxiety kicks up every time he's about to close a huge business deal. In order to deal with the anxiety he heads to the bar to kick one back and take the edge off.  But it has come to the point that anytime he feels anxiety he automatically heads to the bar. Now, he recognizes his anxiety and instead of heading to the bar (old habit) he has inserted a new habit of calling his accountability partner/sponsor that he met at Celebrate Recovery.

We ALL have habits that we wish we didn't have. Some are worse than others and some are downright dangerous. And we can change these habits, but it takes knowledge of what we are doing. By inserting a new habit into the spot of our old habit we can use the same cues as before and still get the same reward. The reward for the alcoholic was not the getting drunk (because no alcoholic says I like the hangover) but rather the temporary release of the anxiety feeling.

With that understanding, you can use recoveryBox to track what your triggers are. Don't confuse the cue verses the trigger. For the alcoholic, the trigger was not "closing the deal" but rather the feeling of anxiety. The cue was waiting for the closing of the business deal. We can't change the cues in life - they exist everywhere. But what does that cue trigger? Realize that feeling and then insert a new habit.

When you text/email your accountability partner, they can clearly see how to relate your triggers with your lights. It will be obvious to link together your triggers with habits. Your habits are being tracked by the light system. An accountability partner can help you see that triggers linked with red/yellow lights mean you are using healthy habits while green lights mean you have replaced bad habits with new ones.

While I know not everyone uses all pieces of recoveryBox (because there are a lot), they really do work together. I encourage you to use the light system in conjunction with the trigger tracking system. Help yourself and your sponsor figure out the puzzle to your behaviors by providing as much information as you can.

As always, if you have questions about how to use the recoveryBox app, please email!  Be supported!!

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Download recoveryBox Addiction Recovery App - Your Complete Accountability Sobriety Toolbox

Do You have to Give Up Your Old Friends - Random Resource ThuRsday

Random Resource ThuRsday brings to your the question "Do you have to stop seeing all your old friends in order to recover?"

This comes from a Great Blog I found called Changing Lives Foundation.

Do you have to stop seeing all your old friends in order to recover?

April 24, 2012 in AA Related, Al-Anon Related. . ., Ask Joe, Relapse, Why Don't they Just Quit,Why Don't They Just Quit? Book Excerpts by jherzanek | 2 comments

ASK JOE:
Old friends and recovery:

Q: Do you have to stop seeing all your old friends
in order to recover?

A. It depends

When I was first getting off alcohol and drugs, many of my old friends
were just like me. I knew that being around drugs and being around
people using them was a bad idea. Exposing myself to the wrong influences
would have been a set-up for relapse. It wasn’t easy to let go of
some of my longstanding relationships. At the same time, though, I was
meeting new people who were also in recovery. I quickly learned that
my new lifestyle and old friends were kind of like oil and water—they
just didn’t mix.


After several weeks of sobriety, I started to see these old relationships
in a different light. I tried to talk to some of my old friends about recovery.
A few of them actually quit using. Others began to avoid me. I stayed
busy concentrating on not using. It was a little depressing, in a way. I
wanted so much to help them change, but many just weren’t interested.

This is a difficult time for the recovering person. There is a sort of
lag-time between leaving old unhealthy relationships and developing
new and better ones. It doesn’t happen overnight—but it will happen.

Trust the process and trust God to provide. For myself, I knew what was
at stake. I had to do this or soon return to the old life. The void in my
social life was going to be filled one way or another. This is one more reason
why support groups are important.

Recovery means making many changes,
and some are more difficult than others.

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recoveryBox Addiction Recovery App - Your Complete Accountability Sobriety Toolbox

Random Resource ThuRsday ~ Support Systems

Last post, we talked about the upcoming features being added into recoveryBox.  The Twitter and Facebook integration.  The premise being it's an extension of your support system if you so desire.

Today is Random Resource ThuRsday and I'd like to continue with the concept of Support Systems.

I ran across a post just about this idea and how it's more than an accountability partner by David Sack MD. Here is the blog post link for the entire article or read below for bits and pieces.

Dr. Sack refers to a piece of addiction treatment that is tried and true - the Support System.
This is where one tried and true component of addiction treatment – a strong social support system – can bolster long-term recovery. A social network can keep recovering addicts invested in their recovery program even if they lose motivation, get discouraged, or become complacent or over-confident.

Research suggests that social relationships provide emotional support, a sense of belonging and stress relief. While higher levels of social connection improve quality of life, lower levels have been linked to relapse.

Here are five steps that will lead the recovering addict to the support they need:

1. Ask for Help - it's NOT a sign of weakness he writes.  And I can attest to that.  Talk to a good friend, find a counselor, pray with a spiritual leader, involve the family (but make sure they are not CoDependent)

2. Choose wisely - this should go without saying BUT when we are in a state of despair, it's hard to figure out just who you can trust, or who really is stable enough to ask into our support system. There are always clues but if you are not sure ask for help in making that determination.

3.  Attend some sort of meeting - this is critical. It can be a traditional 12 Step meeting, it could be a group therapy meeting, Celebrate Recovery or combine them.  He suggests finding one with like addictions because of being able to relate to each other.  Having been through that I agree completely.

4. Remain focused - it's so easy to start feeling good and want to return to "normal life", but the reality is, recovery takes time and so be selective about the types of activities you return to.

5. Be patient - and goodness knows this one takes practice.  It's hard to open up because of leaving yourself vulnerable. You have to process everything you say and do on a daily basis.  Becoming engaged in social settings is not easy so don't be too hard on yourself.  Remember, there may have been bridges burned as well and repair work will take time.  I believe the more patient you are about recovery the better chance of you becoming recovered!

recoveryBox, the mobile iPhone app for addiction recovery can be a huge part of your support system. Use it with your sponsor/accountability partner, counselor, and soon social friends.  Keep yourself accountable to others and yourself.

If you haven't downloaded it yet, get it at the Apple Store today.

recoveryBox Accountability Feature - the key to recovery

Being accountable to someone is key to recovery for an addiction/habit, hurt or hang-up. Accountability could be a sponsor, accountability partner, or even a counselor that you meet with.

recoveryBox makes this simple and flexible/customizable. You decide what to include in the communication text/email by setting your preferences. Even set a daily/weekly reminder to send this off.

While developing this with counselors, it was decided that this feature should be initiated by the person using recoveryBox. Why? When users initiate accountability, compliance and ownership of recovery increases tremendously.

See how EASY it is to be accountable!  Truly! It is that easy!

Go ahead and make the investment in recoveryBox. It's less than the cup of a coffee!

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Download recoveryBox Addiction Recovery App - Your Complete Accountability Sobriety Toolbox

Group Accountability ~ Crucial to Addiction Recovery and Why It's a Green Light

Group Accountability is crucial to addiction recovery. Many posts on this blog have been about one-to-one accountability, but (and I know this is hard) it's so important to attend some sort of Group Accountability meeting.

It can be a traditional 12 Step Meeting, it can be a group therapy session, or a Celebrate Recovery meeting.  Whatever that looks like for you...but it's so important.  

It counts as a G2 - Group Accountability Light.

I mentioned that it's important to find a group that deals with similar addictions.  I will say personally I would not relate to someone who had a drug addiction while I was dealing with CoDependency.  I know from experience that Celebrate Recovery starts with everyone combined to have a worship time and then breaks apart into separate groups and most often by gender.  Others like AA meetings combine everyone together men and women. You are the only one who can decide what feels right but there IS a group that can help you out.

At most meetings you don't have to say a single word until you are ready. But as the time goes along, the reason you attend is to be able to open up, have others understand your experiences, and offer support. Not all meetings are alike - don't give up finding the right one!

Your support system ought to include others who have walked the path that you are going through.



Use recoveryBox with your group to share how your life is turning around and the Green Lights are improving (showing growth in healthy areas).  Share your yellow or red lights when ready.  There is no need to have to rethink everything since you already recorded it. Use that to reflect back at a later date and learn from those mistakes.  Then move on!

Click here to download recoveryBox from the iPhone store.