Thursday, September 7, 2017

Yes, Pornography IS an Addiction!! Random Resource ThuRsday

Yes, Pornography IS an Addiction!!

Do I have your attention now?  I mean it's easier to see something visually right like the picture above?

Yes, viewing pornography is an addiction.  And in this country (and around the world even) many don't view it as an addiction.  It's not harming anyone right?  So it can't be bad like drugs or alcohol, right?

Oh so very wrong.  Those who view porn do it to get the same release that say a cocaine user or alcohol user does.  Look at the picture above.  See how the brain responds with the dopamine in almost identical ways?  Look again!  Viewing porn actually releases more dopamine than some other addictions like cocaine, food, morphine.

And the thing is, our minds are wired to store visuals. So, unlike these other addictions which require an item to be inhaled, ingested, drunk, etc in order to product that high - a person addicted to porn can do it without needing an item.  Once a visual is stored in memory, one can retrieve it.  And with the visual is also stored what happened when the visual was first viewed.  And voila. How the cycle continues.

Pornography addictions is so vastly growing.  With the internet, we can pipe these images right onto our computers or ipads, or phones with only a small search.  It's so accessible and can be done right in the privacy of your own home.

But beware, like with other addictions, your need to have that high will increase. And often the urge to view porn and masturbate will come more often esp with triggers and users will often risk more to get that high.  Many a people have LOST THEIR JOBS from viewing porn at work.  Many a marriages have been destroyed because a man would rather masturbate than make love to his wife.

The human being was created to crave intimacy.  When those needs are not met, many turn to pornography.

We thrive on intimate interactions and relationships with others. When our need for intimacy is neglected, our lives seem unpredictable, hostile, and stressful. The desire to escape or take flight from this stress can be overwhelming. When these conditions are present, we’re more likely to seek sources of release through addictive, and often, abusive behaviors. Unfortunately, when the “vacation” from the stressful environment is over, we return to the same, if not worsened, conditions–the negative emotional environment in which we repeat our cycles of addiction.
“With sexual addiction, instant sexual gratification becomes the addict’s most important, all-consuming pursuit. Part of the elevated mood generated by the activity may involve risk. Special routines and patterns may be followed that increase excitement, usually concluding in a sexual event…over which the addict feels absolutely no control.” (P. 295 Darryl S. S. Inaba, Michael E. Holstein, William E. Cohen, Uppers, Downers, All Arounders, CNS Publications, Inc., July 2000, Edition Number: 4.)
Pornography is an illusionary solution to meet the intimate needs of any participant. It shortcuts the natural process of being physically, emotionally, and spiritually close to another. The sensations are superficial. The bitter irony is that pornography and the use of the Internet for sexual expression actually increases the likelihood of separation from others: the exact opposite of intimacy.

I think this visual is very telling.  Look at the search engine request figure.  Look at the's OK because I'm over the age of 18 and it's not illegal right? I could actually give you lots more figures but I think you get the picture.  I got the visuals from  It's loaded with information so please check it out and become educated.

Treatment for pornography addictions can be a tricky one.  But with attention growing about this, centers are really starting to take a much more aggressive approach with pornography addictions.  Just as a side note, recoveryBox was first created for pornography addictions and was later expanded to incorporate lots of other addictions.  In some areas, porn treatment centers are co-mingled with places where sex offenders are required to undergo treatment.  Be careful of where you select treatment. As with all programs, if it's not a good fit for you then find somewhere else.  But seek help!

And now I bring this full circle.  Why was this the Random Resource ThuRsday?  Because even possessing an item in the house can lead to a relapse and it's so easy.  So go clean out the attic!  The closet!  Wherever you have it stashed.  If you are not at the stage where you can clean it out because you feel too tempted then ask someone you trust to do it for you.

Check out next week's Random Resource ThuRsday where I offer ideas and resources to protect your eyes, hearts, self, family and children from pornography.

Want recoveryBox, the iPhone app for Addiction Recovery.  There are multiple sex addictions to select from.  See which one meets your needs and download it now.  Be accountable to someone!

Sunday, September 3, 2017

Porn Addiction Recovery App

Wanting to break free from a pornography addiction (porn) is not easy. Viewing porn creates the same chemical highs in the brain as using drugs or drinking alcohol. But the difference with porn is that once the images are viewed they are in your brain and you can retrieve them at will and thus recreating that high.

recoveryBox - the Addiction recovery iOS App

recoveryBox was created originally for those in recovery from a pornography or sex addiction.  There are different addictions that you can choose from such as Lust, Sex Addiction, Pornography, Voyeurism. These are there as suggestions of the types of habits that need to be broken (called your red lights).  But you can create your own type of addiction that would work better for you by creating your own custom red lights.

By tracking your good habits (green lights) as well as warning situations (yellow lights - people, places, and things) and triggers you can create a clear picture of what habits you have as well as need to break. Keep accountable with your sponsor or counselor or accountability partner. recoveryBox will let you know it's time to enter your daily lights as well will remind you to connect with your sponsor.

recoveryBox works well with a traditional 12 Step Program or Celebrate Recovery.  Try recoveryBox today. Available for any Apple iDevice.

Don't worry if the lights you see here don't match what you need help with. Customize the addiction to match what you need to track. Users will also want to track their triggers (also customizable) so that accountability partners/sponsors can get a good picture of what's going on.

Want to break the addiction? Accountability does work!

And remember, there are multiple sex addictions to choose from OR you can create your own custom
addiction to meet your specific needs.

Friday, September 1, 2017

How does recoveryBox help me break my addiction?

Wondering what recoveryBox is and if it can help you? Well, do you have an addiction, habit, hurt or hang-up that you want to break? If so, then recoveryBox is your toolbox for the iPhone (or iPad).

Designed for accountability, recoveryBox is an iPhone app toolset that facilitates tracking of daily life activities by easily breaking them down into your "lights". Breaking habits requires knowing why we do what we do, when do we do it and coming up with goals to break unhealthy behaviors. recoveryBox has the tools needed to help with addiction recovery.

recoveryBox is designed to work with any addiction: drugs, gambling, pornography, alcohol or customize your own specific to your needs!!

Use as much or as little of recoveryBox as you need. Visiting the How To Use Page will tell you more about the app but let's break it down.

1. Entering your daily lights (which are your daily routine activities). As you progress in recovery, you will see the number of green lights (healthy activities) increase as the number of yellow lights (warning light activities) and red lights (acting out) decrease.  

The idea is to focus on changing your habits but by being accountable (see step 3).

2. Track your triggers. Know what sets you off so that you can try and avoid. Customize your triggers.

3. Be accountable to either a sponsor or accountability partner. This is a simple step of sending a text or email to your sponsor directly from recoveryBox. Included in the accountability communication will be totals of your lights as well as reasons for yellow and red light activities. You can customize this too.  Being accountable is how the conversation gets started about what's really happening in your recovery.

4. Earn badges for your accomplishments! This is huge! Everyone needs affirmation when heading in the right track. Let recoveryBox help you by showing you progress and milestones not only for time being sober but for activities that are part of a healthy recovery.

5. Enter treatment goals. These goals can be developed by you, with a counselor, as part of a group or with your accountability partner or sponsor. And if desired, treatment goals can be linked to either a traditional 12 step program or Celebrate Recovery steps.

6. If you attend a traditional 12 step program or Celebrate recovery program, use recoveryBox to track which step you are in, journal while in that step as well as well as create goals. You can even switch back and forth between the wording for each step.

7. Sobriety Anniversary Date tracking is crucial to our recovery journey. See how long you have maintained your sobriety as well as set goals for a new sobriety date. recoveryBox will adjust your anniversary date if red lights are entered. Customize the sobriety date screen by adding a motivating picture of those you love.

There are lots of other tools that are part of recoveryBox: 
  • search daily lights with any customizable dates to find patterns,
  • pray the serenity prayer, 
  • access daily devotionals, 
  • motivators that can be customized to remind you to enter your daily lights as well as text/email your accountability partner/sponsor, 
  • customize the daily communication piece, 
  • customize how daily lights are entered, 
  • post badges as well as anniversary dates to Facebook or Twitter, 
  • find recoveryBox resources, 
  • communicate with recoveryBox staff right from the app regarding bugs or requesting new features,
  • share recoveryBox with friends directly from the app,
  • rate recoveryBox from the app so that others find hope in their recovery
Good luck!

Thursday, August 31, 2017

What are "Lights?" in recoveryBox?

So you are wondering what exactly are these lights?  That's the easy part...they are your daily activities broken into your greens (the activities/habits you want to build), the yellows (umm, these are people, places or things that are putting you at risk for acting out and you want to avoid them), and the reds (activities that are part of your addiction).

The goal of course is to have as many greens as possible.  By taking care of your green events on a daily basis you will see how you are starting to take care of yourself and your yellows and reds will start to lessen.

Next post, I'll explain how to use those greens to track activities.  recoveryBox is extremely flexible with your lights.  It allows you to basically give weight to the green lights for accountability to your sponsor or accountability partner.  But wait, I'm getting ahead of'll have to wait until I
get to that blog post.

Can't wait, check out recoveryBox the site for more info.

Want to download from the Apple App store..thanks.  I'm available for questions anytime.

Wednesday, August 30, 2017

Becoming Accountable with a Sponsor/Accountability Partner using recoveryBox

How To Video Series for recoveryBox iOS App for Addiction Recovery

Below you will find our How To Videos for recoveryBox -becoming accountable. When we want to change a bad habit/addiction often the best thing (and often hardest) is allow ourselves to accountable to another person - most often a mentor or counselor or someone who has been through a similar journey. While choosing that person is difficult, you will know you have chosen well if they make you feel a bit uncomfortable with your negative habits while praising you when you choose well.  By uncomfortable we mean they are holding you accountable by wanting to perhaps talk through what happened or bring to light something that might be holding you back.  

Being accountable with recoveryBox is very easy as not only does the app have all your data that is easily aggregated into a simple email or text, the app allows you to customize how much or little data is being sent based on how you and your accountability partner work together.  recoveryBox even allows you to set up alarms to remind you to send that communication.

You might ask if that app can send the accountability piece automatically to your sponsor or counselor?  The answer is NO!  We believe that you must OWN your recovery and therefore while we have all the tools at your fingertips, you must be the one to make the decision to be accountable to someone else.

Becoming Accountable

recoveryBox Voted Best Alcoholism App of 2017

Congratulations on making Healthline’s list of the Best Alcoholism Apps of 2017!  Our editors carefully selected each winner based on quality, user experience, and providing support to the community.
 Know someone who needs help with their alcoholism?  Consider being part of their recovery journey.  Have them download recoveryBox today and offer to be their accountability partner.  We as a community are all part of the solution.

2017 Best App for Eating Disorders

Congratulations on making Healthline’s list of the Best Eating Disorder Apps of 2017!  Our editors carefully selected each winner based on quality, user experience, and providing support to the community.

Know someone who needs help with their eating disorder?  Consider being part of their recovery journey.  Have them download recoveryBox today and offer to be their accountability partner.  We as a community are all part of the solution.

Thursday, March 30, 2017

Random Resource ThuRsday - Prescription Drug Addictions

Recently I had a surgery on my foot and for the first few weeks I was on pain killers (goodness knows I did need them).  And it got me to thinking..yes I did include this as an addiction in recoveryBox but why?

So this week's Random Resource ThuRsday is about Addictions and Prescription Drugs.

How does one go from using these medications for the intended purpose to addicted to them? And how do teens view these drugs that they find in the medicine cabinet?  The following comes from Drug Free World.

Recreational use of prescription drugs is a serious problem with teens and young adults. National studies show that a teen is more likely to have abused a prescription drug than an illegal street drug.
Many teens think prescription drugs are safe because they were prescribed by a doctor. But taking them for nonmedical use to get high or “self-medicate” can be just as dangerous and addictive as taking illegal street drugs.
There are very serious health risks in taking prescription drugs. This is why they are taken only under the care of a doctor. And even then, they have to be closely monitored to avoid addiction or other problems.
Many pills look the same. It is extremely dangerous to take any pill that you are uncertain about or was not prescribed for you. People can also have different reactions to drugs due to the differences in each person’s body chemistry. A drug that was okay for one person could be very risky, even fatal, for someone else.
Prescription drugs are only safe for the individuals who actually have the prescriptions for them and no one else.

Talk to your kids today about these drugs - and yes, they are still drugs!

Tuesday, March 21, 2017

Using recoveryBox with a Traditional 12 Step Program or Celebrate Recovery Steps

How To Video Series for recoveryBox iOS App for Addiction Recovery

Below you will find our How To Videos for recoveryBox - Using recoveryBox with a Traditional 12 Step Program or Celebrate Recovery Steps. Record what step you are on, journal as much as you want, share those entries with whomever you want and add treatment goals to that step.

Please note, if you are a person who doesn't want to use a 12 Step approach then you don't have to - ever!  Perhaps you might want to check out the Treatment Goals section instead!

Traditional 12 Step program or Celebrate Recovey Steps Using recoveryBox

Monday, March 20, 2017

Working with Triggers in recoveryBox

How To Video Series for recoveryBox iOS App for Addiction Recovery

Below you will find our How To Videos for recoveryBox - tracking/customizing triggers. We understand that knowing what your triggers are and the emotional response that brings on can lead to acting out and so it's important to track that as well.  Perhaps realizing that having an anxiety level maxed at a 10 is part of the problem.  Or maybe your trigger is actually how you feel with certain people?  We don't know and won't pretend to know and so recoveryBox allows you to decide what those triggers are and allows you to assign a value to that each day for your accountability partner or sponsor to see in a daily email or text.

Tracking/Customizing Triggers

Friday, March 17, 2017

Using recoveryBox for Addiction Treatment Goals

How To Video Series for recoveryBox iOS App for Addiction Recovery

Below you will find our How To Videos for recoveryBox - Goals for treatment for an addiction can come from a variety of places. Create goals with a counselor, perhaps you have person goals, create some with an accountability partner/sponsor. no matter where they originate from, track them all on one place in recoveryBox. Attach a 12 step to a treatment goal.

Treatment Goals Using recoveryBox

Thursday, March 16, 2017

How to Tell Someone You Have an Addiction - Random Resource ThuRsday

It's Random Resource ThuRsday and I thought I'd answer a question someone sent me recently.

They asked "How do I tell my mother that I am an alcoholic?"

What a great question and I'm NO expert here so I started doing some research on this myself and thought I would pass along a resource I thought that was quick to read, easy to understand and that get's right to the point.

This is from ClearWater Treatment.  Check them out when you have a chance.

Telling Your Family You Have an Addiction Problem

Telling Family AddictionContributed by Nikki Seay.
The day that you find yourself actually having to admit that you have an addiction to drugs or alcohol is likely a day that is overwhelming and frightening. As addicts, we work so very hard to try and hide our addiction.
We work especially hard to hide it from the people we love and admire. These people are usually our family members. So how do you find the right words to look them in the eyes and tell them something that you know is going to break their hearts?

A Good Chance They Already Know

The truth of the matter is that if you have been in contact with your family members on any sort of regular basis during your addiction, they more than likely already know you have a problem with addiction. As addicts, we often think we are doing a real bang-up job at hiding our disease from the people we care about the most. In reality, we aren’t doing a good job at all.
Addiction is a disease that can only be hidden for so long, and then the signs become absolutely impossible to cover up. Anyone who knew you before addiction took control of your life already knows that something is terribly wrong. It may take them a little bit of time to figure it out, but they eventually put the pieces together.
When you begin to come up with what you want to say to your family, it’s probably best to assume that they already know you are struggling with a drug or alcohol addiction. When you stop to think about it, it is likely they have even attempted to talk to you about your addiction in the past. Don’t insult their intelligence by denying how long you have been trying to cover your tracks. Be honest with them, and they will be more receptive to the conversation.
While the conversation that you will need to have with your family will no doubt be an emotional one, you need to take the time beforehand to plan what you really want to say. You need to have a rational blueprint of sorts. The reason for this “blueprint” is so you can be sure to say what needs to be said, not what just ends up coming out of your mouth in reaction to emotions like pain or anger.

Getting Needed Addiction Treatment

The most important part of the conversation with your family will be the part where you tell them what you are going to do to help yourself. No doubt, you will want to tell them how sorry you are for any hurt you caused them (and they do need to hear you say that you are sorry), but you should also have some information to share with them about getting into an addiction treatment program.
You need to explain to them that you are ready and willing to acknowledge your addiction today. More importantly, you need to share with them that you are ready and eager to enter into an addiction treatment program. You may not have all the answers to give them about where or when you will enter into an addiction treatment center, and that’s okay. All you need to convey is that you are ready to do what needs to be done in order to get your life back. That is a great first step.
Your family may be upset with some of the things you have done during your struggle with addiction, but they will always love you. Family is forever, and they ultimately want to see you in recovery. The conversation you have with them to admit you are an addict may be a difficult discussion, but it is one that you have to face.
Once your loved ones see you are being honest and humble, they will be more than willing to help you through rehabilitation and provide you with a great support systemduring your addiction treatment. Once you have this conversation with your family, you will be surprised how much weight is lifted off your shoulders, and how much more ready you’ll feel to begin your recovery.

Honestly, I love the part that says "they already know"!  Isn't that the truth.

Have a great weekend.

~the developer from recoveryBox

Haven't downloaded recoveryBox yet, check it out!